I never saw Jaden at the party after – he must’ve gone home, and after seeing the fiasco with Jevon I wouldn’t blame him for not wanting to talk to me. I got his number from Shebby but was too scared to use it yet. But he said hi to me outside of school the next day! Ahhh, he’s so dreamy!!
I feel kinda weird that he’s younger than me, but that’s okay, right? Gosh, he’s so cute though, and nice! He told me how pretty I was. Jevon never said that to me – he just called me weird. ‘Course he said it with a smile, which made me think he was joking or being affectionate, but now I don’t think so. I think he was just using me, or at least trying to. I never even kissed him.
My sisters told me that everyone was talking about me and Jevon, and then about me and Jaden. Ahh well, let ’em talk, I say! I can do what I want. Oh — but they were also saying I was drunk. That’s not so good. And totally not true! Why would they even say that? I was only drinking lemonade!
I thought about what Jaden had said about my dancing. My ballet slippers were still on my night stand, where they had been since I won the award when I was in grade school. I really liked dancing! And at that moment I decided I would go to the centre and sign up for a class again. I was gonna pursue my dream!
Dad and I went to the centre to after school to sign me up for a ballet class. When we got home, I actually got the nerve to call up Jaden! Perhaps I should’ve waited for him to contact me, but I was feeling brave so I just dialed his digits like I was on a rotary phone! Haha, not really, cause it was an instant tap on his name and the phone was ringing. Daddy told me, back in the old days you had to dial for like 5 minutes just to call someone and now I was nervous as heck that it was already ringing and I wished I prepared myself more for this… oh my…
His dad answered. Apparently it was the home phone –or else his dad was answering his cell phone– and I almost hung up.
“Uhhh, hello, is Jaden there?”
Jaden asked to meet me at the coffee shop! Eeee! I was so excited. But I wasn’t expecting…
“Hello, Mr. Best–”
I wasn’t expecting his dad to be with him. But I guess he had to drop him off. And whoa, his Dad was as hot as he was–maybe hotter! He had the same bright green eyes. “Call me Harper,” he interjected.
“I don’t care what anyone thinks of you,” Jaden said when his Dad left us to hang out. “I think you’re hot.”
“Th-thanks.” I stuttered. I guess it was nice that we all think one another are hot.
…but what did he mean by ‘What anyone thinks of me’? What does he know? Are people still talking behind my back about me and calling me weird and crazy?
I felt less than desirable here with my wet umbrella and inevitably frizzy hair in this humidity. Not to mention feeling a little warmer from Jaden’s compliments…
“Hey, don’t worry.” I guess he could see the sudden worry in my face, even in the dark lot. “People will say what they want. It doesn’t mean it’s true. I appreciate someone who works hard for what they want. And you’re a dancer! I admire that. It’s pretty sexy. I admire anyone who takes it upon themselves to learn a new craft, especially in the arts.”
“Thank you!” I smiled, relieved. I knew I was good at dancing, and I deserved to be a superstar at it! “My goal is actually to become a master acrobat,” I told Jaden.
“Wow, that’s awesome!” He said. “Would you, like, twirl umbrellas and stuff?”
“Hehe perhaps so! I guess I should get some practice, but not in this rain, with this wet umbrella.” We both laughed.
“I actually just signed up again for a class, it starts next week.” I told him. “I haven’t danced since I was a kid.”
“Wow! That’s super!” He said. He was so encouraging and sweet. I’m sure I was flushing.
After we had our drinks inside and were about to leave, I saw my Aunt Isabelle! I hardly ever get to see Aunt Isabelle. She’s Dad’s half sister and she’s sooo pretty, I wish I could see her more. She was gone away for a long time when I was a kid – to a boarding school somewhere. But now she’s back and married – I guess they knew each other a long time and I guess I have a new uncle too!
I told her I have a dance class next week, and she said she has to go to the arts centre around that same time and she might see me there!
So it was a fun night and I went home pretty happy. No kiss from Jaden but that’s cool, I’m still afraid to kiss a boy.
As it turned out, we hung out the next night at my place.
“Do you want to go sit out in the grass?” Jaden requested.
We didn’t talk a whole lot, but it felt comfortable and nice. I liked how he looked at me, so sweet with his bright eyes, not like Jevon’s smirk all the time. I felt like Jevon was constantly scrutinizing me, but Jaden was like he was admiring me. Maybe he looked up to me ’cause I was older, I dunno. Maybe because he was new here and he hadn’t seen all that many girls.
Oh… why am I so special then? I’m nothing special, I’m just a weird girl. With an already damaged past.
I could feel him wanting to inch closer, like he wanted to touch me. I shifted a little and leaned in a bit. I wanted to touch him too. I wanted to smell him. I think he was wearing cologne. Jevon didn’t wear cologne.
Before I knew it, he had grabbed my hand.
The next little while was a bit of a blur. I don’t even know how much time had passed. My heart was racing and he made me feel tingly. I guess this is what they call butterflies?
He played with my fingers and said he wished he could do palm reading and read my future. He touched the hem of my skirt and said “that’s a nice dress”. “It’s a skirt, actually.” I said breathlessly. “And a top. Not a dress.”
Oh.. that must’ve sounded silly. Boys don’t know about clothing and fashion. I was just too conscious that he touched me and I was probably saying a lot of stupid things.
Soon he said he had to go, and I barely even realized we stood up when he suddenly leaned in and planted a kiss on my lips! Oh my. It was so romantic.
My first kiss, with a beautiful boy! Am I dreaming??
The instructor’s helper at the ballet school — I forget her name — she was real nice and encouraging. She told me, if I had done this before as a kid, then I would have no problem adjusting again and re-learning things as a teen. I just needed to get back in shape and my body would remember what to do, basically.
“Yoga and meditation does wonders! Just be ONE with your body and breath deep always! Focus on a spot on the wall when you’re balancing, and just use your inner strength to keep you stable.”
“Wait, is this a dance class or yoga class?” I asked.
“Well… both are interrelated, you see. Your Spirit is what guides you, and if you’re not really connected with your Spirit you can’t be fully in control of your body.”
Ooo-kay, that was a little weird, but anyway, Dad and I tried to connect with our bodies and our Spirits to do a yoga-esque ballet move.
My dad looked so silly trying to dance… hehe!
It was a whole freaking family affair. I guess they were trying to be supportive but still, it was a little embarrassing with my dad and my geeky brother Sashdo in wanna-be ballet clothes.
The first class was a family meet-and-greet, but once they were finally gone, I got some time to practice at the barre. I could feel my body remembering, just like Yoga Girl said! It was so good to be back dancing again!
The day ended perfectly when I got to see the ice cream truck… and my Auntie Isabelle! She was supposed to be doing a performance or something at the arts centre but she had to cancel because guess what — she’s pregnant! That was cool news!
“I didn’t say it the other night because you were there with your boyfriend–”
“He’s not my boyfriend.” I interrupted.
“Oh? Well, that’s too bad. He’s a cutie. Grab him up, sis! And tell your dad hi for me, okay?!”
I was happy to see Aunt Isabelle. It was funny how she called me sis. Maybe now I’ll get to see her much more, like another sis– a big sis I could look up to. And a baby on the way! That means I’ll be a… great-niece or something?
“It’s gonna be your cousin, silly! Cause I’m your aunt so my kids are your cousins. But you are a great niece!”
“Oh. I’m so dumb. Family trees are confusing.” I pouted.
She told me I shouldn’t beat myself up and don’t worry so much. How could she tell I had anxiety? She was so laid back.
She seemed so happy. And I should be happy too. I had a great day, and Jaden likes me, and I was feeling inspired to dance!!